My Prayer

Two weeks ago, I stepped onto an airplane in Lusaka, Zambia. My knees shook. My hands were sweaty, and my heart was racing. The idea of reentering my own culture had nearly crippled me with terror. I shot a desperate prayer heavenward and begged sweet Jesus in heaven to preserve my sanity.

As per usual, He came through.

The first week or so was pretty rough. Thankfully, I have better friends than I deserve. They have listened to my constant rants. They have patiently sat through tears of homesickness and separation. They have diligently pulled me away from cute little babies in Walmart (apparently I have a staring problem…), and they have endured hearing the same stories, the same regrets, the same nostalgic musings over and over and over again. They have brought my scattered wild thoughts into focus, and they have reminded me to be where I am until I get where I’m going.

At the end of the day, I find my prayers centering on two groups of people—the friends I left behind  and the friends who were waiting for me here. In many ways, my friends and I here at Belmont are all on the same journey. We’re all trying to figure out what on earth we’re here for, what God has called us to (both individually and collectively), what that looks like in daily life, and how to make the changes in our own hearts and actions that need to be made (did I mention that my friends are pretty much awesome?).

With that quest in mind, I offer this prayer for those dearest to me, whatever continent they may find themselves on...

May your eyes be opened to a world you have never seen before. May you be willing to love those who don’t deserve it and those who won’t love you back, even if it hurts and disappoints you. Especially if it hurts and disappoints you. May you banish laziness and complacency from your lives. May you recognize your vices and temptations and flee from them. May you work with all the passion and fervor that one heart can contain while still remembering Paul’s warning: “If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.” May you encounter the Living God in everything that you do, even if you’re not looking for Him. May religion be stripped away to be replaced by Relationship. May you never look at a hurting person—man, woman, or child-- and feel nothing. May you banish the “I can’t” statements from your life. Don’t say you can’t go, or you can’t fix it, or you can’t endure it. May the cultural expectations that fuel those “I can’t” statements become steadily less important as you draw closer to the cross of Christ. May you ask difficult questions. May you demand difficult answers. May you be willing to ask for help when you need it, and may you offer help wherever it’s needed. May you not be discouraged if you continually lose the battle. Sometimes that’s life. But that’s okay, because it’s not about the battle. In the end, the Victory has already been won. 

May we be better for knowing each other.  Thanks for putting up with me. ;)